Just being

Changes. My inquisitive brain does not leave me alone, continuing to endlessly analyze and correlate the sequence of events and my perception of these or those. Which I'm so happy about! What I am proud of inside myself. What erases any boundaries, limits, restrictions in my consciousness.

Just being. Amazingly, I once considered this to be an extremely weak argument to be considered for this kind of pro argument. Today, it is exactly the opposite. It's a colossal difference! Let me try to explain.

Math is the queen of the sciences. And here I tend to "tighten" everything to formulas. Although the word "tighten" has become too frequent in my vocabulary. So, why don't we value "just being" at some periods of life, and then give this role a great deal of importance?

Being a whole, a unit, self-sufficient (as it seems to us) and a personality, one way or another we see people around us. Some of them attract us for absolutely incomprehensible reasons, others on the contrary - repel us, causing internal dissonance of almost all organs. © "A man needs a man"! Only 3 years ago I was skeptical about this phrase (a line from a beautiful poem), but now. What keeps us in a person is what we lack today, now, in the moment. What we cannot give ourselves, call, buy, make with our own hands, feel... when sublimation is powerless and thirst is full.

You can't run away from yourself.
If only to you.
Anyway, write it down.
Maybe you're awake, too.
At that eternal two o'clock in the morning.

Suddenly you're standing on the street somewhere,
You want to find some kind of sign.
Come!
If you're awake, too.
At this best two hours of the night.

© Valya Loginova

Now run the projection. Dinner? Respect or envy of acquaintances? Passion? Money/gifts? Knowledge? Connections? Which of these benefits and comforts were you looking for in a person when, after the first 20 minutes of your face-to-face interaction, you looked them in the eye? What were you missing in yourself that you didn't know, didn't know how to do, couldn't afford, or wanted "in reserve"? Today it is increasingly common to choose "money", finding dozens of arguments. They are, it must be said, extremely convincing. And yes, perhaps many people would choose "for".

Years have gone by like a day. And tomorrow it'll be +3 and in a week you'll be 70. Is money near you? Next to you houses, apartments, cars and unconditional comfort? That's great! That's worth a lot. Are you happy? I'm not! All things being equal, I see a person who "just is," just around. A man in whom my house, my apartment, my cars - my unconditional comfort - is my man. Unconditionally, without evaluation, as it is. Whatever he does, whatever he does, is nothing compared to the fact that I have him.

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